Monday, July 5, 2010

Week 23 - Blues

Feel a little bit down since last night. I am furious with myself that I do not know how to say it out. I thought I am so good at expressing myself in a straightforward manner. Yet since i know the topic is very sensitive I tried to talk in a diplomatic way but I just couldn't.

I carried my mood to my workplace. It's Monday, I am late as usual and I have nothing to smile about. Even thinking of all my clothes that does not fit me anymore makes me unhappy. I have been home late way after midnight, including outstation travels which requires me to drive for 4 hours one way, and walkabout a huge dangerous site all by myself. I felt I am expected of too much at work even in my current condition. I am frustrated too that I could not find a proper way how to discuss this with my superior to be more understanding. Futhermore, I could not afford to fall sick at all this year since I have exhausted all my MCs. If only I can just resign, but I still have 3 months to go till the start of my maternity leave.

Momo called me a while ago telling me he did not get the job from the interview he went to 2 weeks ago. I could sense from his voice that he is a bit down too, and yet I did not say anything to lift up his spirit and be a suppportive wife. I know normally I do that, but today I just feel I couldn't, and I felt bad about it.

Maybe today is just one of those pregnancy blues day..


  1. Ha, looks like Monday blue really creep into you ha? dont worry because Monday will not stay untill Tuesday.

    Life is not a bed of roses, really but hey do you know there is this guy who can make us all feel good,if we just believe, his name is God.

    Keep that marriage going, put love in the centre, put God in the middle, put selfishness aside, throw ego outside, dont keep eveything inside,ya.

    God bless and come back again

  2. it's one of those shitty days when everything that cud go wrong, went wrong. Dont resign dayung, just 3 more months, remember? im sure even in his blue days, Momo wud understand what ur going thru. Take it easy dayung...

  3. eugene,
    yes I do believe in Him. That's what I keep telling myself last night. I try telling myself that not everything is perfect, and there are some things I might just have to accept, if not I have to do something positive out of it, for the sake of a good marriage.

    coffee girl,
    i don't feel anything is wrong, its just that today does not seems to be a happy day for me. hopefully tomorrow is a brighter day.. anyway thanks dayung for listening..